I always say that I'll start blogging more frequently.. that I'll sit down every night and take time to get my thoughts out.. that I'll appreciate looking back on my blogs when I'm older and wiser..
but.
Anyway, since my last post (over one month ago.. sorry!) we've celebrated Christmas and our first wedding anniversary on 1-1-11. Wedding Anniversaries are fun! We got lots of cards and well wishes and enjoyed a relaxing morning followed by shopping and dinner.. nothing too fancy, but just wonderful to have a day to ourselves and to do whatever we wanted with no assigned plans! it was lovely.
Here's what we've learned in one year of marriage. ha!
1. You will disagree. You will argue. and it's okay! I think we were so scared to argue that we actually held things in, in the beginning of our marriage.. what a crock! it's okay to argue, we use our own set guidelines and try to fight fairly and respectfully.. and it's okay that we fight! we know that now.. and we're glad.
2. (Kara only) Not every supper will be a super dooper winner winner chicken dinner type of meal.. it just won't... you will make things that he doesn't like..This was a hard one for me.. I was sure that every supper had to be a huge ordeal with several dishes on the table and if he didn't drool over my wonderful meal that I was less than a good wife! What a ridiculous thought! I eventually lightened up on myself and it's okay that he doesn't love everything. he'll get over it. or he can make himself a peanut butter sandwich. it's that simple.
3. You're not naked all the time. You're just not. Life goes on. bills come in the mail. grocery shopping must be done. dentist appointments made. family get togethers attended. taxes filed. life goes on. enough said about this one.
4. Money is hard to share. and you will fight about it. It's hard to share money and it's hard to make joint decisions about purchases, budgets and bills. It's going to be hard. Just have a good chat about how blessed you are compared to so many unfortunate folks in the world. and you'll move on from this too.
I hope this was a good laugh for your marriage veterans and maybe a good piece of advice for anyone getting married in the future. We've learned that love covers a multitude of flaws and a good laugh can fix just about anything.
Love and hugs.
Kara
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Kara, I had not read your blog before now, but I really enjoyed it. You're cute & real, and to me that's what makes good writing. :)
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to give a little insight from 10+ years of marriage (how has it been that long?!). Sharing money is very hard, especially when you KNOW that you need those incredible shoes from the mall, and he's just not understanding why. ;) To avoid this problem altogether, Dave & I give each other an allowance every month. It's not much, and it's been different amounts throughout the last 10 years, depending on how much we could afford at the time. We each have our own checking accounts, in addition to our joint account. When I get my allowance on the first of each month, I put it in my account and spend whatever I want on whatever I want. If I want something big, I save for it for a few months. If I see an outfit or a pair of shoes that I can't live without, I buy it with my own money. Dave does the same. We give each other money for Christmas & birthdays, to waste however we want. :)
It may not be a perfect system, but it works for us, and it certainly takes the strife out of 'money-sharing.'
Happy house-wifing! :)
that's great advice Ginny! Thanks so much! I'll talk to Tommy about that.. it seems like such a good idea!
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